A reflection by Lily M. Lemma

Have you ever noticed how loud criticism tends to be?

It echoes through workplaces, threads its way into family dynamics, and finds an easy home on our timelines. It comes quickly — sharp, immediate, and often unfiltered, a reflex more than a reflection. But appreciation? Appreciation is quieter. It lives in glances, in silent acknowledgements, in nods, in thoughts we often forget to say out loud.

Lately, I’ve been reflecting on this, not just as a wellness coach, but as a human being navigating work, family, community, and purpose. In my own life, I’ve seen how easily criticism rises to the surface, while appreciation must be called forth with intention. Even in moments where love is present and good things are happening, we sometimes forget to say it, to name it, to celebrate it.

We magnify what’s broken and minimize what’s beautiful. We rush to disagree but hesitate to affirm. And the truth is this isn’t just how we treat others; it’s often how we treat ourselves.Too often we notice where we fall short, but rarely do we pause to acknowledge the quiet ways we keep showing up.

But wwhat if we reversed the trend?

What if we trained ourselves to speak up just as quickly for what’s working, for what’s kind, for what’s growing and blooming and healing? Not to ignore what’s hard or what needs change but to hold both: honesty and honour. Challenge and celebration. Correction and compassion.

Imagine workplaces where feedback means “what to build on,” “what’s working’ and not just “what to fix.” Imagine homes and friendships where we don’t just point out frustrations, but express admiration. Imagine being the kind of person who notices goodness and says it, without delay.

And what if that same gratitude extended inward?Self-gratitude is about recognizing effort even when progress feels slow. It’s about pausing to say, “I tried today, and that matters.” These small acknowledgments may seem insignificant in the moment, but they carry weight. Over time, they become gentle reminders that strengthen our resilience and help us keep going. When we listen to those whispers closely, they can change everything.

It’s a shift. A discipline. A heart habit.

If we are going to be loud about our criticism, let’s be equally vocal about our gratitude. Let’s give appreciation a voice, not just a place in our minds.
Let’s learn to say: That was beautiful. You did well. I see you. Thank you.

Because silence may be golden but appreciation, when spoken, is priceless.

A reflection by Lily M. Lemma